by GELLIE FARAÑAL
Have you ever thought of faith having a downside? No, right?
Have you ever thought of faith having disadvantages? Never, right?
But what about asking God, ‘Do I look like I was faithful unto you?’
Yes? No? Maybe?
Do you think you are faithful to God, alone?
We all had that ‘conditioning’ or ‘scheduling’ or ‘planning’ words in our vocabulary. As Christians, we do these things so we can figure out our priorities in a day or in a week. By these actions we are able to come up with knowing how we can make time for life groups, bible studies, Sunday services, house church gatherings, and the like.
Being new in Christianity back in 2019, these planning principles I learned from the Church were something I am happy about because it changed my life. I was able to organize my day, my week, my errands, my commitments, and how I tend my faith on God. I love planning and organizing my life. Everything was under my control. At that time for a new Christian like me, it is one of the biggest steps I thought would make me closer to God. And yes it is. I wake up at 5 in the morning so I could arrive to Church at 8 even if the service starts at 9. I consistently attend Youth Reloads on Fridays and life groups on Wednesdays. I do my devotional every 5am and 9pm. I tithed with my 10% and offered every time I was asked for and even when I am not. I did a lot for the Lord I think.
Doing these consistently was my one-year agenda and I thought I was the closest to God and that I was the most ‘dasig’ Christian everyone would like to become. Until one day, Holy Spirit intervened my pretty sitting pushing me to think about my agenda, my planning.
Aye! What are your plans?
Dili na nimo maclassmate always imong lifegroup sisters, unsay himuon nimo?
Mas maglisod na imong kurso, unsay himuon nimo?
7am to 9pm na ang imuhang klase, unsay himuon nimo?
Gadaghan ang mga depressed sa imuhang eskwelahan, unsay himuon nimo?
Strikta na ang imong teachers, unsay himuon nimo?
Mugraduate na ang imong leader next sem. Dili na physically naa imong leader. Muconnect pa kaya ka sa akua kung wala siya? Unsay himuon nimo?
All I could only remember from what I have said was that, ‘Lord, have Your way and I will still commit.’
All the events came to pass. And it really made everything difficult. I still had my planners but also I had a lot of plans unattended. Taking control of each day seemed difficult to attain. I still continue doing my devotional, prayer, life groups, and ministry each day but it is still not easy because I felt quite loaded. I felt tied on these words ‘Kaya pa namang isiksik sa time, Lord’ until I had no rest at all trying to comply things and also compromising.
I ask God back.
‘Shouldn’t having Jesus make life easy?’
But He said, ‘Shouldn’t being with Jesus make life better?’
Being with Jesus is not something I have. I overdo things for Him but I am not doing things with Him.
I am so much in control of myself that I forgot to give the control unto Him.
I was focused on doing things for Him over Him.
I thought we have a relationship, but all I did was just business.
I had Jesus but I was not in Him.
I never thought that I became legalistic, that I became complacent.
That one-year agenda crashed in the quarter end of it. Letting God take control of my life never made my life easier but it became better. In November 2019, God convicted me to start joining and committing to Youth to the Nations or Y2DN so I will to be connected with people who had the same and greater desires for the school and the world and also to be able to connect people unto Him. God changed my address and gave me a motor vehicle so I could get to school and to church way better than when I still live and ride jeeps in Mintal. God also made me connect to students in UM and SPC in which now are my little life groups. Today, we in our life group still connect with each other and I am happier that we are able to bring more women within. He made me honed in His home rather than my home.
That is the downside of faith. You have to deny yourself because you have accepted Jesus. You have to let the control unto Him so He will be able to control your life. You have to understand that yes, you are glorious but all the glory belongs to Him. He is the most glorious. You have to understand that God’s ways of putting you in a struggle is not a punishment but just a test if you would still commit willingly. You have to understand that when God says, ‘Unsay himuon nimo?’ He is letting you know how greater things you could have that He has prepared for you when you let the control be His instead of yours. The downside of faith, self-denial, is not a disadvantage if you look at it with the eyes of humility. It might be hard to take risks and to let go of your own control but its result is one of the greatest things you will enjoy for eternity.
Maybe that is why you feel restless today because you too overdo things and that you have been blinded of the reality that you are no longer with Him. If you are that person, I pray that the blindness in your eyes from seeing the only good God that you and I have will be taken away by the blood of Jesus; that wherever you are right now, you continue to commit unto God even if days get harder and persecutions never stop; that you will understand one day why hardships are there; and that you will be able to rest in the love and peace of God. Hardships are inevitable but so is God. Keep pressing unto Him even if times will contradict your faith. I pray that you desire to be fed with manna over milk. Don’t let your ‘Lord have Your way and I will still commit’ promise be left undone each day. Keep on pressing, praying, and abiding, surely whatever you have in your heart, God will multiply. Amen.
Matt.16.24 – 25
Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”
God got you, always.
Connect with us!
We are offering online lifegroup sign up here:
Comments